Friendship

I have just spent the evening talking with a very old and dear friend. We have known each other for twenty years, but until tonight there were pieces of the jigsaw that makes him who he is that were missing. I don't know why he chose tonight to talk so honestly - things just seemed to lead that way. And I don't know why he chose to tell me some of the things he did. I hadn't asked, and our friendship isn't based on any need for me to know. But I was deeply moved by both what he said and the fact that he chose to tell me.

What is friendship about? A shared history? Being supportive? Offering advice and a shoulder to cry on? Maybe all these. But sometimes these get in the way of what is important; and that is acceptance.

I think being a true friend is accepting the contradiction that people are as they are, and also that they are essentially unknowable, as we all are. And being truly open to that contradiction.

Sports Day

Dearest daughter's nursery Sports/Fun Day was a hoot. Watching twenty 3 and 4 year olds running relay races was hilarious. The boys were great at the running, but when it came to the balance and control required for the egg and spoon, and balancing the bean-bag on the head, the girls came into their own.

I have to embarrassingly admit to a certain amount of trepidation beforehand, as sports have never been my strong suit (to put it mildly). Even the mention of the words 'Sports Day' made me feel all anxious and took me right back to my school days of miserable enforced participation.

Anyway, I needn't have worried. Dearest daughter enjoyed it all, and actually acquitted herself fairly well. (must get that from her father) And she won a jar of sweets for guessing the number in it correctly. So she was happy. And so was I.

I still didn't join in the Mother's Race though...

And here's a classic from the other child...

My son and I have been scaling the heights of the mountain known as potty training. We have a mantra currently running in our house:
(Me) 'Where do wee-wee's go?'
(Him) 'In the potty..!'
Before he blithely wees in his training pants.

Anyway, we are going to France on holiday in the summer and I have decided to go cold turkey with the potty training. Here's how the conversation went:
(Me) 'When we go to France, there's going to be no more nappies. So where do wee-wees go?'
(Him, triumphantly) 'In the swimming pool!'

Hmmm..

Lazy Sunday afternoon.

Yeah, right, who am I kidding?

All I've done today is slave. Changed all the beds, as they hadn't been done for so long, I've forgotten when I last did it.. I'm not normally so slovenly (well, mostly not) - it's been a mad few weeks with dear daughter's operation. And then I cooked and then I hoovered. And cleared up all the kids toys. And then did it again when they got them all out again. (I never learn - wait till they go to bed, Claire...)

I hate days like today. You see, I avoid housework all the time and leave everything until it absolutely has to be done all at once instead of being sensible and doing a little bit every day. And then I have a day of crashing round the house getting grumpy with everyone and feeling hard done by because I'm doing domestic stuff.

I've got quite a wierd week coming up. Check this out for a bizarre juxtaposition of events.

My dear daughter has her nursery 'Sport's Day' on Tuesday. Now my child has lots of great skills and attributes, but co-ordination is not one of them. (She takes after her mother, so I'm hoping they don't have a Mother's Race.) I'm not sure how this is going to turn out, but hope it won't result in a wholesale loss of confidence and refusal to countenance anything sporting in future.

Then, I, together with my bestest friend, are off to see Bon Jovi on Tuesday night. Now I used to like Bon Jovi. When I was 15. But we decided to go for a laugh, and to see if Jon Bon Jovi has aged well. I expect he's doing better than me. Am slightly concerned for my bestest friend's unborn child though. All that stuff about playing Mozart to them in the womb - this child is going to be getting a bit of a shock come Tuesday night... I may just have to ask them to turn it down a bit.

And then on Wednesday, we are off on holiday for a few days, en famile. Including my inlaws. And we're going to Filey. God help us if it rains. If it's sunny we can just yomp about on the beach all day and then get fish and chips. I can't even think about what happens if the weather's bad. I'll let you know how if goes.

And then on Sunday, we are off to sunny Southport to celebrate the Diamond Wedding Anniversary (that's 60 years!!) of my dearest grandparents. Have bought myself a very expensive outfit as I figure that this is really something to celebrate!

So, all in all, a busy and eventful week ahead. Watch this space for the results!

Don't they say the sweetest things...

Saying goodnight to my daughter the other night, she hugged me tightly round the neck and said,
'Ahh, Mummy, I want to keep you.'
I said,
'That's nice, sweetheart.'
To which she replied, casually,
'Yeah, but you're gonna die soon.'

Nice.
Don't you just love them....

Operation tonsils

My daughter had her tonsils out on Monday. And her adenoids. And had gromits put in her ears. The full monty. Poor kid - she's only three. She was so good though. Luckily for me she chose her dad to go down to theatre with her, and not me. So he got to see them putting her under, which I think I would have struggled with. I was left to contend with a two year old son intent on trashing the hospital.

Anyway, a few hours (of blood-pressure inducing worry) later, she came round and within the day, she was sitting up in bed eating Jammy Dodgers, drinking Ribena and holding court with the nurses. Amazing.

She has got better and better through the week - as long as the pain is managed, you wouldn't know there was anything wrong with her. Night-time is the worst, as she wakes up in pain. In the day though, she is fine. She has really started to milk it though, as I think she senses that this special time of privileges (sweets and CBeebies) will soon be over.

I am now starting to return to the usual state of vague worry, rather than the full-on anxiety I have had this week.

Oh yes, she had this operation to cure a runny nose which she has had for two years. I'm trying not to panic, but at this stage, it's still running.

An update...

Well, I have been conspicuous by my absence recently. A lot has been going on.

I finally finished by End of Course Assessment for the OU course and have submitted that. It was a bit of a slog to get it done on time, but I managed. I got some marks back for one of the other assessments which I was really pleased with. Good marks and good feedback. I will post the story on here, but I'm entering it for a competition first, so expect to see it when I get the rejection ship ;-)

We have been having our garden sorted out by some garden people. We've had raised beds put in and a new patio and will shortly be getting a greenhouse. It's like the Good Life around here.... Shall let you know how the vegetable growing goes.. Needless to say, the whole job has taken far longer than expected and cost twice as much as we anticipated. We have employed your typical British tradesman - the excuses for not turning up so far: a funeral, hayfever, the rain (of course), the van broke down. So all par for the course and perfectly normal. Anyway, the job's done, so now all I have to do is get the front drive replaced where they mixed concrete on my gravel...

My daughter is going into hospital on Monday for an operation to remove her tonsils and adenoids, and possibly have gromits in her ears. She's fine about it - I'm trying not to be a nervous wreck..

We went to our first parents' evening at my daughter's new school. She starts reception class in September. I know everyone tells you that time flies when you have kids, but I really can't believe this - she's still my little baby! We found out which class she will be in, and I was pleased that some of her little friends from nursery will be in her class with her. That's what I worry about - friends! I don't worry about school work or anything like that, just that she might be standing on her own in the playground looking all sad and lonely! Anyway, I'm sure there will be further outpourings on this subject as the time draws nearer....

Off for a nice gin and tonic now!